Questions every couple should ask before marriage

May 16

There was a season in our relationship that was hard. Very hard. I wasn’t sure if what we had was real love or simply lust in disguise.

We were the best of friends, we just “worked” together and everything about us as a couple seemed to fit in place perfectly  Not to mention we were gaga for each other. All signs were pointing to engagement.

But even after we were engaged, a nagging question remained.

It wasn’t a surface thought that lingered daily at the forefront of my mind, but this deep ponder in the recesses of my heart and sub conscience.  I could feel it’s weight when I slowed down long enough to be bored; in the quiet of my solitude. When there was no one else around or nothing to keep me busy and distracted.

What if I got fat?

What if I couldn’t have sex anymore?

What if I told him ALL of my ugly- the stuff I hate to even admit to myself?

What if I had a stroke and wound up with a completely different personality?

What if I got hit by a car, burned in a fire or became handicapped or paralyzed?


…..Would he love me then?

While I’d quickly assure myself, “yes, of course he would,” I truly wondered. We can ask these things but rarely do we consider them as a very real possibility.

In our own circle of friends, we can attest to more than one of the above circumstances. They became a very real reality in the lives of people we know. And let me tell you, they never expected their life would turn out that way; they never fathomed how difficult and heart wrenching it would be!

What if your life looked like this tomorrow? Would you honestly make the same decision she did?

Marriage is so much more than your wedding day or a party to celebrate two people. It’s the joining of two lives as one and a commitment to love each other through thick and thin. Truly ponder your marriage vows…

… In sickness and in health
… In good times and in bad
… To love ALL the days of your life.

More than anything, marriage is a gift – the gift of joy found in service; the giving of our life,  the putting of someone else before our own needs and loving selflessly, as Jesus did for us.

Can you truly make this commitment with integrity and sincerity? Have you considered what that may look like?

While marriage is precious and beautiful, reality can also look bleak and desperate some days. There will be seasons when you have to consciously decide to love each other, to push through and not give up. To accept that the greatest joy is in the in-between moments- the small glimpses of Glory amongst a thousand more tough ones.

In all the excitement and fairytale talk, someone needs to ask the hard question.

…. Will you love them even then?

…. Will they love you even then? 

Be brave, be courageous and dare to consider it with your fiancé.


 The inspirational couples shown above captured by ShutterHappy Photography, Jamieson Dean Photography + Citygate Films


About Kailey-Michelle

Grace clinger. Marriage lover. Moment savourer. Passionate Creator. Seeking to inspire this generation as a Professional Wedding Planner, Speaker, Writer and Business Coach, to focus on what matters most in life and leave a legacy of love and service.
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Posted in Engagement, The Married Life

2 Responses

  1. Jacquelyn says:

    I just wanted to say how much I appreciated your comments on marriage and how much your words spoke to what has been on my heart lately. Thank you!